How To Find And Refine Your Style In Your 40s

Without a defined personal style that resonates with your current lifestyle and identity, you might feel disconnected from how you present yourself to the world. This disconnect can lead to a wardrobe full of "nothing to wear," making getting dressed a daily frustration. Instead, you might continue to rely on outdated fashion rules, feel unsure about how to dress for your body type, or waste money on clothes that don't feel quite right.

You’re in the right place! I created this proven, 5-step process to help you redefine your personal style in your 40s, based on my research and experience over the past several years. In this journey, we'll cover everything from conducting a thorough style audit to embracing the latest trends with confidence. I'll also give you some things to look out for along the way, mistakes I made before I worked out this system, and ones I still see other stylish women making.

Just follow the steps, and by the time you finish Step 5, you'll feel empowered in your own skin and enjoy a wardrobe that reflects your unique sense of style and complements your daily activities.

Ready? Let’s dive in!

Finding one's personal style in your 40s isn’t just about following new fashion trends or filling your closet with timeless pieces—it’s about personal evolution and embracing a renewed sense of confidence. This decade is the perfect time for a complete style overhaul, a fresh start to refine your fashion choices and ensure they truly reflect who you are now, not who you were ten years ago. It’s about learning to make investment pieces work for special occasions and everyday wear, understanding the best fit for your body shape, and stepping out in great style every day.

During our 40s, we often find ourselves more comfortable with who we are. This comfort should extend to our fashion sense, where the goal is to feel as good as we look. To begin this transformation, we introduce the concept of a "style audit." This method is a critical foundational step that allows you to align your wardrobe essentials with your evolving lifestyle and personal identity. A style audit involves several key activities:

  • Assessing Your Current Wardrobe: Identify which items are your go-to pieces, such as that pair of jeans that always feels just right, or the classic blazer that’s been a staple for years. Understand which items you no longer wear and why—perhaps those skinny jeans or pencil skirts don’t match your current lifestyle or comfort needs.

  • Defining Your Body Shape and Preferences: It's crucial to dress for your current body type, choosing clothes that flatter and fit perfectly, whether it’s a slip dress or leather leggings. This step helps you move beyond the old clothes that no longer serve you well.

  • Aligning Your Wardrobe With Lifestyle Needs: Whether it's casual wear for running errands or power suits for the boardroom, your clothes should match your daily activities. This alignment ensures that your style choices enhance your confidence in every setting.

By undertaking a style audit, you prepare the ground for building a capsule wardrobe that features not just classic cuts and neutral colors but also elements that add a bold print or bright colors to reflect your personality. This process not only simplifies getting dressed each day but also ensures that each piece of clothing is something you love and feel great wearing.

What to look out for: Many women in their 40s overlook the importance of aligning their wardrobe with their current lifestyle and personal growth, leading to a closet full of clothes but nothing to wear. Don’t let that be you!

This is a crucial foundational step that will set you up for success in the next stages of refining your personal style. Each step is a building block for the next, so embrace this fresh start with enthusiasm and watch how transforming your wardrobe transforms your life!

All done? Great job!

Let’s move on to Step 2.

Step #2: Conduct a Comprehensive Style Audit

At this point, you're probably thinking that diving deep into your closet is a huge time suck. It might even feel a bit overwhelming to sort through everything and make decisions about what stays and what goes.

You may be wondering, "How exactly will a style audit help me?" If you stick with it, the clarity you gain will be incredibly rewarding. What we're doing is setting the foundation for a wardrobe that truly represents you—not just who you were, but who you've become. This is not just about sorting clothes; it's about aligning your external appearance with your internal changes.

Here’s how to conduct a thorough style audit, ensuring every piece in your wardrobe earns its place:

Reflect on Your Wardrobe:

  1. Evaluate Your Favorites:

    • Comfort: Identify pieces that offer comfort without sacrificing style. A good bra or a soft pair of jeans can boost your confidence significantly.

    • Color: Look for colors in your wardrobe that make you feel alive and complement your skin tone. Maybe it’s the jewel tones of a maxi dress or the subdued hue of a classic trench coat.

    • Fit: Focus on the fit of each item. A tailored blazer or a perfectly fitting slip dress can make a huge difference in your look.

    • For example, you might rediscover an old favorite like a pair of skinny jeans that still fits perfectly and makes you feel great. Or, you might find that what used to be a favorite no longer suits your style or comfort needs.

  2. Assess Fit and Flattery:

    • Consider how your body shape has evolved and identify styles that enhance your current figure. Perhaps the midi skirts or A-line dresses you used to overlook are now exactly what flatter you most.

    • Look at how the clothes match your body type. Are there certain pieces, like skinny jeans or oversized blazers, that highlight your best features?

  3. Visual Diary:

    • Start keeping a photo log of your outfits on days you feel most confident. Note what you're wearing, the colors, the fit, and how these elements contribute to your confidence.

    • This diary will help you identify patterns in your preferences and guide future shopping decisions.

Lifestyle Alignment:

  1. Daily Activities Analysis:

    • Map out a typical week: What do you do, and what do you need to wear for these activities? Separate your needs into categories like work, leisure, and social.

    • This step ensures you have appropriate and comfortable attire for different parts of your life, from professional settings requiring a two-piece suit to casual weekends perfect for jeans and a graphic tee.

  2. Practical Considerations:

    • Evaluate the practicality of fabrics and fits based on your daily activities. For instance, if you spend a lot of time outdoors, consider durable fabrics like denim or leather.

    • Think about maintenance, too. Are you willing to spend time on dry cleaning, or do you prefer wash-and-wear fabrics?

The reason this step is crucial is that it helps you build a functional, cohesive wardrobe where every piece has a purpose. Plus, you'll find that having a well-organized closet makes it easier to get dressed in the morning, saving you time and reducing stress.

Here are some tips to help you move through this step quickly:

  • Tip #1: Set Clear Style Goals: Before you start, know what you want to achieve with your style audit. Whether it’s reducing clutter or focusing on finding key pieces for a capsule collection.

  • Tip #2: Be Ruthless: If you haven’t worn something in over a year, it’s probably time to let it go. Make exceptions for special occasion items or seasonal wear.

  • Tip #3: Ask for Feedback: Sometimes it helps to get a second opinion. Invite a friend who will give honest advice on what looks great on you.

What to look out for:When I first started refining my wardrobe, I hung onto clothes that no longer fit, hoping they might one day. This common mistake can hold you back from embracing your current self and style. Instead, focus on clothes that fit and flatter you right now, making room for new pieces that align with who you are today.

Just keep focusing on what works best for you, and you’ll be on the right track. Ready to dive deeper?

Let’s move on to Step 3.

Step #3: Inspiration and Experimentation

Are you starting to get excited? I hope so. We're just about there. You might be feeling a bit overwhelmed with the possibilities or unsure where to begin with refreshing your style. That's perfectly normal. Any time you're trying something new, it takes a minute to find your footing. Just be patient and stay with it.

Next, let's tap into the world of fashion inspiration and begin experimenting with new looks that reflect your personal evolution. This is where you get to play and have fun with fashion, discovering what truly makes you feel vibrant and alive.

Seek Inspiration:

  1. Fashion Icons and Influencers:

    • Explore style icons in their 40s who not only look great but also resonate with your style ethos. Platforms like Instagram, Pinterest, and fashion blogs are fantastic places to start. Look for influencers who share a similar body type or lifestyle.

    • Take notes on elements that you admire. Is it the bold prints they wear, their use of bright colors, or how they mix classic pieces with modern trends?

  2. Create a Vision Board:

    • Compile images and themes that speak to your aspirational style on a digital platform like Pinterest or on a physical board in your home. Include everything from outfits and colors to accessories and lifestyle images.

    • This vision board will serve as your style guide, helping you visualize the overall aesthetic you’re aiming for. It’s a dynamic tool that you can update as your preferences evolve.

Experiment with Style and Color:

  1. Branch Out:

    • Experiment with different styles through rental fashion services or subscription boxes. These options allow you to try new trends without committing, which is a great way to step outside your comfort zone.

    • Consider incorporating pieces you might not usually pick for yourself. You might discover a new trend or silhouette that looks unexpectedly good on you.

  2. Color Exploration:

    • Take some time to discover which colors flatter your skin tone the most. A color consultation could be a fun way to learn about what shades work best for you.

    • Integrate new, flattering colors into your wardrobe gradually. Start with accessories like scarves, belts, or jewelry if you’re hesitant about wearing bold colors in larger pieces.

  3. Accessorizing:

    • Learn how different accessories can transform and personalize your looks. A simple outfit like jeans and a basic t-shirt can be elevated with the right scarf, a bold necklace, or a stylish crossbody bag.

    • Experiment with various accessory combinations to see how they can enhance your outfits. Remember, accessories are not just additions but integral parts of any ensemble.

While you’re doing this, make a note of what excites you the most. Is it the thrill of discovering a new color palette, or do you get more joy from mixing and matching accessories?

Make any adjustments you need before you move on. For example, you might start small by incorporating one or two experimental pieces into your wardrobe each season. This approach lets you evolve your style gradually without feeling like you're overhauling your entire wardrobe at once.

If you want, you can download my “Style Mastery Workbook" I created it to help you enhance your looks with simple additions that make a big impact, without the stress and overwhelm.

Click here to download Style Mastery Workbook" so you can get started.

What to look out for:

It can be tempting to jump on every new trend you see on your vision board. However, not every trend will be right for your body type, lifestyle, or comfort. Focus on finding trends that align with your personal style and incorporate them thoughtfully.

Just keep exploring what makes you feel best, and you’ll be on the right track.

Let’s move on to Step #4!

Step #4: Define and Refine Your Signature Style

We're just about done. There are just two more steps. This step is where you really start to see your new style come to life. You've explored and experimented, and now it's time to solidify those discoveries into a distinctive, refined personal style that feels authentic and empowering.

Signature Elements:

  1. Signature Color Scheme and Distinctive Silhouettes:

    • Reflect on the colors and silhouettes that have consistently made you feel good when you reviewed your visual diary. These will form the basis of your signature style.

    • Choose colors that not only complement your skin tone but also resonate with your personality. Whether it's the calmness of neutral colors, the boldness of bright colors, or the richness of jewel tones, make sure these colors are present in your wardrobe.

    • Identify silhouettes that flatter your body shape and enhance your best features. Whether it's the sleek lines of pencil skirts, the relaxed fit of oversized blazers, or the elegant drape of maxi dresses, ensure these shapes are staples in your closet.

2. Personal Symbols:

  • Incorporate elements into your wardrobe that reflect personal milestones, beliefs, or passions. This could be artisanal jewelry that carries a story, a vintage scarf passed down through your family, or custom accents that showcase your hobbies or heritage.

  • These personal symbols make your style uniquely yours and can serve as great conversation starters, adding depth to your outfits.

Refinement Through Tailoring:

  1. Pop-Up Fittings and Style Swaps:

    • Attend pop-up fitting events where professional stylists can offer personalized advice tailored to your body type and preferences. These events often provide insights that you might not have considered on your own. If these are not held in your area consider going to Nordstrom and work with a Nordstrom stylist online or in person.

    • Participate in style swaps with friends or community groups. These can be excellent opportunities to refresh your wardrobe, experiment with new styles risk-free, and refine your style with pieces you might not have purchased but find surprisingly versatile.

  2. Creative Layering:

    • Master the art of layering to give old pieces a fresh look. This skill is especially useful as it allows you to adapt your wardrobe to changing seasons without always buying new pieces.

    • Experiment with different combinations, like layering a slip dress over a fitted turtleneck or a graphic tee under a classic two-piece suit. Layering isn’t just practical; it’s also a creative expression of your style.

What to look out for:

​No matter what you do, don't get stuck in a style rut by wearing your clothes the same way all the time. If you do, you'll only risk stifling your style creativity. So just slow down and focus on mixing and matching pieces in new ways. As Coco Chanel famously said, “Fashion fades, only style remains the same.”

Keep going! You’re nearly there.

Step #5: Invest Wisely and Sustainably

This is the last step. Get ready to celebrate! You’ve defined what looks great on you and discovered how to express your unique style. Now, it’s time to ensure that your wardrobe not only looks good but is also built sustainably and can stand the test of time. This final step focuses on making smart investments in your wardrobe and choosing pieces that are not only stylish but also responsibly made.

Quality Over Quantity:

  1. Essential Investments:

    • Focus on acquiring high-quality staples that serve as the foundation of your wardrobe. These are items like a well-tailored blazer, a perfect pair of jeans, a little black dress, or a classic trench coat. These pieces should be versatile, timeless, and durable.

    • When selecting these essential pieces, consider the fabric quality, construction, and longevity. It’s better to spend more on a garment that will last for years rather than buying several cheaper items that won’t hold up as well.

  2. Sustainable Choices:

    • Emphasize the importance of choosing ethically made clothing and opting for sustainable fabric choices. Look for brands that are transparent about their manufacturing processes and that use materials which are kinder to the environment, like organic cotton, bamboo, or recycled materials.

    • Educate yourself about the sustainability practices of your favorite brands. Are they using fair labor practices? How are they minimizing their environmental impact?

Mindful Consumption:

  1. Tech-Savvy Shopping:

    • Utilize apps and tools that help you make informed purchases about garment origins and the sustainability of their materials. These technologies can provide insights into the lifecycle of the products you buy, helping you make choices that align with your values.

    • Some apps also offer digital wardrobe organizing, which can help you keep track of what you own and wear most, aiding in making more thoughtful purchases in the future.

  2. Local and Lesser-Known Designers:

    • Support local artisans and smaller designers who may not be as well-known but offer unique and meaningful additions to your wardrobe. Often, these pieces come with stories of craftsmanship and care that you won’t find in mass-produced clothing.

    • Buying from local designers not only helps to reduce the carbon footprint associated with long-distance garment shipping but also contributes to your local economy.

Here’s how to get the best results with this step:

  • Tip #1: Take Inventory Regularly: Periodically review what you have to avoid duplicate purchases and keep your wardrobe lean and functional.

  • Tip #2: Quality Check Before Buying: Always check the seams, fabric, and details of garments. Well-made clothes last longer, so this scrutiny pays off in the long run.

  • Tip #3: Choose Versatility: Invest in pieces that can be styled in multiple ways, offering you a variety of looks from a single item.

What to look out for:The first time I shifted to a more sustainable wardrobe, I realized how often I was tempted by fast fashion trends that didn’t last. Many people make the mistake of buying into every new trend, which leads to wasteful consumption and cluttered closets. Instead, focus on building a capsule collection of items that fit well, look great, and are made to last. This approach not only saves you money in the long run but also helps you maintain a clear and cohesive style.

It just shows you there’s more than one way to be stylish and responsible. So more than anything else, do what works for you. And finally, here’s a Bonus Tip just for you! After years of refining my own approach, keeping a seasonal "style journal" has really helped me track the evolution of my taste and maintain a wardrobe that truly reflects who I am, season after season.

Congratulations on completing this journey to redefine your style in your 40s! You're now equipped to enjoy a wardrobe that is not only stylish and flattering but also responsibly curated and truly personal.

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This blogpost was originally published October 2, 2023 and was updated April 17, 2024

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